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When Your Autistic Child Hits or Attacks

A simple plan. One step at a time.

3-step response

  1. 1

    Keep everyone safe — gently block, don't grab.

  2. 2

    Use few words: "Hands are for helping."

  3. 3

    Offer a replacement: squeeze a pillow or stomp feet.

Calming tools

Take a break

Step away for 60 seconds. The moment will still be here — and you'll meet it softer.

Breathe together

Breathe
in… and out…

Follow the circle. 4 seconds in, 4 seconds out.

First → Then

Name what comes now, then what comes next.

First

Quiet time

Then

Favourite snack

Why this might be happening

Hitting is often communication when words aren't accessible. Stay regulated yourself — co-regulation comes before correction.

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Help name the feeling so hands don't have to.

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